Why I hope my Daughter goes to a Small Liberal Arts College in the South.

My daughter is only 10 months old.
But like any parent, my mind tends to wander down the road a little bit-- wondering how tall she will be? What kind of talents will she have? What Sport will she play? What kind of person will she become?
And yes... What kind of college will she go to?

When I think back on the person I was growing up, and heading into High School -- I'm actually surprised that my choices and decisions led me to the college I chose.
But I would do it all the same if I had another chance.

It was athletics that sent me down Interstate 81 to find my "soon-to-be Home". I was recruited for Volleyball by probably a half-dozen different small colleges across Virginia. They each had pros and cons. ( I wont get into those here because you never know who might be offended when I call *********** a college full of **********************. I would truly hate to offend anyone.)
But I will admit that the Final Match-up was between Mary Washington University and Emory & Henry College.
Who knows where my life would have ended up if I had just chosen to drive North on Interstate 81, instead of south. WAAAYYY South.
But if I could do it again I would do it the same. In the words of the ever-so-wise Corey Smith.

So... What would I say to my daughter in 17 years and 2 months when she is facing this dilemma? What kind of wisdom could I impart? What have my years and years of experience taught me that I can use to help my sweet little girl find the right college for her?
Let's give this a good ol' college try...

1. Despite what you may think... College is about LEARNING.

It is easy for me to say that now-- being that I graduated 5 years ago-- but I think it is something to note. Obviously the point of any college is to LEARN something, but each of us learns in different ways and we need to make sure to take that into consideration before choosing a school---- because I would hate to waste $$$$$$$ for you to fail out or worse; not learn anything.

For some, they find it best to sit in a gigantic classroom full of hundreds of other students while a professor paces in the front trying to explain some theory or math problem with his/her hands.

For others, that type of environment would be a constant distraction (ME!) and does not give the kind of time and attention that you need to learn (ME!).
There's nothing to be ashamed of.
If I had gone to Virginia Tech with my Best Friend I would have failed out. I would have missed at least 75% of my classes Freshman year... just because I COULD and there was no one to notice or get me in trouble with my "mommy".

But when you go to a small Liberal Arts College with an average of 20 people in a class AND a pretty strict Attendance Policy-- you GO to class.
You drag your hungover butt out of bed and walk your Pajama-wearing ASS up the hill to M.S.(a class building) for your 8:00 am Intro to Political Science class every Tuesday & Thursday.
No matter what. Or else.
Seriously, don't mess with Dr. Lane. I do mean, or else!

2. The Rural-er the Better.

Doesn't make sense to you does it? 

No, I don't want my daughter to be living in the middle of a cotton field with a barn for a dormitory. But.... Big Cities have their charm... AND their drawbacks.

A) Cost of Living: I lived in a 4 Bedroom house (utilities included) for $300 a month in college. Find me something like that in Richmond. Or Charlotte. Or even Roanoke. 

(RIP Glade Spring KPhi House. You are missed. I know your new family loves you very much. You can tell from the brand new (replaced) front porch, paint, and yard with flowers... not trash and beer cans.)

B) T-R-O-U-B-L-E: (Intentional Travis Tritt reference) Cities= Bars, Clubs, etc. When you are 30 minutes from the closest "club" it keeps you a little bit more restricted and you can't make that ride allllll the waaaaaayyy to Bristol every time you want to have fun. You save that for "special occasions". (Hence: The College House Parties. Don't Worry. It's coming)

C) Lack of Retail Opportunities:  She is my daughter. So, genetically she will not be able to avoid any opportunity to BUY SOMETHING.

And my mom learned that lesson the hard way when I charged $$$$ (mucho money) on my "student card" in the Bookstore for "school supplies" 

AKA: Lots of Vera Wang, DVDs of Laguna Beach Season 1 & 2, Every single pair of sweatpants available, some snacks and candy for the dorm (bc my roommate ate all my shit!) and some other overpriced yet very adorable E&H gear. 

Lets just say that card was CUT OFF real fast.

3. College Drive.

At every school there is a place/area/community, where people go on the weekends to hang out or know they can find the best parties and the best party people.
It's not always called College Drive, obviously... but at Emory, it was!

My Freshman year was spent at "College Drive" (obviously I'm talking about a house not an entire street. Just to be clear for those of you non-WASPS reading).
That was where my friends would go every week (or day) to hang out, play cards, throw parties, play beer pong, etc. My Freshman year-- if you wanted to know where everyone was on a Saturday night... it was College Drive.
College Drive eventually evolved into a few other "locations" -- at one point including my Senior Year residence --- which after my graduation suffered a sad fate. Luckily, it was adopted by a nice family and is living a lovely life. With a new front porch.
... oh, shit. yeah. THE POINT....
The point of the story... and "College Drive"... is that there is somewhere to be social.
You may not have bars and clubs like bigger cities...  but at those places you're not just hanging out with people your age-- You're hanging out with ol' Cowboy Mark, and that creepy toothless guy eyeing your friend.

At "College Drive" you meet your classmates. The soccer team. The drunkest girl in school. (and some other classifications that I wont go into)

I made some of my fondest memories over the years at these parties.
I met my best friends. I lost friends. I saw some HILARIOUS stuff and I saw some scary and serious stuff. I cried. I laughed. I danced. I puked. I rallied. I almost got arrested (a few times actually).
But in the end, I remember those days/nights/weekends fondly. And I get sentimental and nostalgic whenever they come up. (like now... I'm in the mood for a College Drive basement party full of Boones Farm (ugh. nevermind), Rap Music (or random oldies) on the Stereo speakers and a set of wooden steps that someone ALWAYS fell down. Every. Single. Time!)

4. You paid WHAT to join a Sorority?

This is not Greek bashing.
I get it, people. I joined a sorority in college. Most of my friends were also in sororities in college. But Greek Organizations get a lot of flak for, quote, "paying for friends".
Well let me tell you... the most I paid was $100 for my 1st Semester Dues... and the rest was all alcohol and parties, people.

If my sorority tried to charge me THOUSANDS in dues -- I would have told them I could find a cheaper place to drink. Bye, Felicia.
I worked part-time at Chili's and my mom was NOT paying my bills (at least not all of them-- after that whole "bookstore" issue).
So I am glad that I went to a small school that not only embraced a very diverse and PASSIONATE Greek Life... It was also accessible and affordable to everyone.

5. Your Professors Become Mentors and Friends.

I not only respected my Professors in college, I admired them. I looked up to them.  And I consider myself lucky to continue to call many of them friends to this very day.
I can't imagine Professors at larger schools being able to connect like that with every student in a classroom of hundreds. It would be exhausting. 

I even had some of my teachers at our wedding -- my first college professor (and my husband's advisor), Dr. Roper, even officiated our Wedding. He and his wife drove all the way back to Emory from South Carolina for the ceremony. I adore him.

Those are relationships that I will cherish for the rest of my life. All of my professors were more to me than teachers. They taught me more than just what was in the textbook-- they taught me about life. They acted as my sounding board, my guidance counselor, my strong-handed reminder, my moral compass, my advisor, my confidant, and my friend.
Of course I want that kind of guidance for my daughter. If I can't be there with her every step of the way, I would like to know that there are people looking out for her the way my professors looked out for me.

6. You will find a place to call Home.

Please don't get me wrong. I do not finish my workday and tell people I'm going to my "current place of residence"-- back to good ol' Franklin County.
Home isn't just an address-- its a feeling. Home is where you can be whoever, say whatever, and do whatever you feel is right and comfortable. It is where you can be yourself, no matter who is around. It is where your heart feels whole.

It may shock some people to know that even 5 years after walking across that stage and earning my diploma-- I still consider Emory & Henry College my home. Even though I managed to set down roots in another area-- I still get the same warm, fuzzy feeling when I pull off Exit 26, turn right down the road and through the stone entrance to campus. My heart is whole. My mind is calm.
And nothing has ever had that type of calming impact on me in my life (and some of you may know I'm a little hyperactive-- so calm is a good thing).
If someone asked me to "Envision" my happy place-- like that stupid banking commercial-- it would be Emory. Next to the Duckpond, walking the brick pathways, through the trees....
And I know a lot of people who feel that way.

From my Wedding Day. In case you couldn't tell. 

Why else would a campus with LESS than 1,000 currently enrolled students on a daily basis OVERFLOW with THOUSANDS of Alumni on Homecoming weekend?
And some of those people are in their "later years"... (and by that I mean super old.) 
What other college has that type of commitment to a weekend of Football? (And lets just say E&H hasn't attracted a crowd for their Football successes over the years... but that does seem to be improving!! GO WASPS!)

And I have been to so many E&H Alumni Weddings on campus and in the chapel.
It's not because it is cheap and it is not because its an easy-to-access location. No.

It is because this is home. This is where you want to start your life. This is where you want to bring your kids. This is where your heart feels whole.

Why wouldn't I want my daughter to find a place like that? 
And I really hope she does.

With Love, 
J.

(Below is a shot of our Wedding Day at the Chapel on campus. This image means more to me than any photo from that entire day. This is where my heart is. A big Thank You goes to my amazing photographer Olivia for capturing this moment that I cherish.)